Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Teen Talk Tuesday–Modesty of Heart


I hope you have been blessed by this months series on modesty.   Each post has touched on one important truth – that modesty all begins and ends with our heart. 

I think if we just took time to allow His love to overwhelm us – to be our joy – to be our strength – to be our hope – to be what we live from and NOT for – we would live a life that not only shows others who He is – that we would be Jesus to them. 

A modest heart is a humble one.  

I have spent weeks watching videos and reading articles on modesty – both from adults and teen perspectives.   It is a topic that definitely is not addressed enough.   Why do I say that?  Look at most teens at church today.   Look at the way teens dress at your school.   Modesty is not the norm at all.    I almost always leave church feeling sad for the women and girls I see who are dressed for a night on the town – versus laying their lives down for Christ or coming to worship Him.  

I not only feel sad for them – I pray for all the men and teen guys who are potentially being stumbled by them.   I pray that their hearts are strong enough to resist the temptations before them everywhere they go.   There doesn’t seem to be a safe place for them to go where they are not under pressure to resist what is blatantly in front of them.  

As a mom of four sons I find myself thinking about guarding their hearts and minds in a world that has simply let go of modesty.     That laughs at it and calls it uncool.  That makes fun of those who are choosing to wait for the spouse God is preparing for them.   That ridicules those whose moral values are different than the world around them – who are feeding into all the temptation thrown at them day in and day out.  

Whether we women and girls want to accept it or not doesn’t change the fact – that men were created to be visually stimulated.   Their minds are drawn to beauty.  God created Eve perfectly for Adam – so that he would only desire to be with her.   God created each of us perfectly too.    He created us to be the perfect mate for our spouses.  Not the perfect mate and eye candy for everyone else.  

I am amazed and often times embarrassed by the photos I see teen girls posting on their *facebook* pages.    These teen girls are Christians.   Part of me doesn’t blame them.   I seriously think it has to come from us their parents and then the women they see at church who are called to disciple them.     I think we are failing the youth in a big way by not expressing to them their full worth in Christ.  I think we are failing them by telling them how beautiful their inappropriate photos are and guide them to think about all the boys that are now able to stare at the photo.   I think we are failing them but not teaching them how important it is to come to their marriage without the guilt of their youth and sowing “wild oats”.   

Every time you wear an outfit that elicits looks or comments from boys and even girl friends that you look “*sexy, *hot, etc.” should be a big red flag that your outfit was not appropriate.    You are selling yourself short and definitely stumbling someone around you.   They will most likely never tell you they felt uncomfortable or caused them to think of you in a way that is not pure.    

I found a video that talks about this very thing and I pray you watch it completely – then share it with your friends, youth group and start talking about how you can help the teens you know rise above the low expectations of their  generation.   To rise up to God’s expectations for us and live a life that speaks of our love for Him.   How we dress totally reflects either our love for the world or God. 

I can only speak for myself and how I feel after spending time in God’s word about my responsibility as a woman…one that desires to represent Him well.   Not only do I not want to dishonor God, I truly don’t want to dishonor my husband.   This is what I teach our daughters.  Not only do they not want to wear anything that would dishonor God, nor should they desire to wear things that would dishonor their father or me.   They also need to consider that their future spouse might be watching them.  How would they feel knowing he sees them wearing clothes to get all the other boys attention?

Seeking attention is prideful.  And we all know pride is a sin.    God resists the proud and gives grace to the humble.   Which brings me back to the point I first made – modesty begins and end with our hearts.  

Is your heart turned toward God today? 

Do you know how much He loves you and desires to give you all the attention you could ever desire? 

Do you know that His love is pure, holy and good?  

His love gives life! 

His love changes you from the inside out!  

His love will build up your worth and give you confidence to live a consecrated life for Him. 

When I try to explain His love for us – my words can’t touch upon the depth of what His love can do or will do for us.    Yet, this song helps me understand it a bit better:

My heart cry is for all of us to live a life so filled up with His love – our one and only desire is to shower others with His love.   

That we desire to be different from the world and let everyone know we are His.  

That we stop trying to make the world comfortable and be holy people, because He is holy.   

That we stop trying to make excuses for our sins against Him and think of the price He paid to set us free from the bondage of sin!

Imagine if we all acted out our profession of faith and even without saying a word, others would know we belong to our KING!  

Are you willing to pray to live a life so sold out for Him that others will see Jesus and not you?   Are you willing to pray for a life that smells of the fragrance of His goodness and love?   Are you willing to lay down your life and set aside what you want for the good plans He has for you?  

Modesty begins and ends with a humble heart.  

Humble yourselves  in the sight of the LORD today and He will lift you up!

Here is a great article to read about humility by one of my favorite authors – Andrew Murray!

Praying for you today!   Praying to hear from more teen guys and that you will help encourage the girls around you to walk out their faith humbly…and the only attention they desire is God’s!   Praying for all of us parents to train up our children to desire to bring honor to God – not in word but in every deed.


PS I found an article a few weeks back written to a daughter at college after a fellow student sadly took his life.   This article may NOT be appropriate to be read before a parent does.   Please ask your parents to read it first – honor me by doing that.   The reason I am sharing this article is because too many teens don’t understand the gift of mercy, grace and true forgiveness.   No mistake you have made is too big for God to handle!  

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