Tuesday, February 28, 2012

A Life Story

delicious ambiguity

I can safely say Gilda’s quote is very true about my life.   I can’t even remember a time where I knew what life was really going to be like.  It has been way too long ago.   Maybe not as long as I may think, but it sure feels like a lifetime ago, when I was able to predict with some certainty where my life would be in five, ten, or fifteen years.    That all changed the moment I truly handed my life and heart over to God.  

I fooled myself many times into believing I would know what the future held, or how it might look.  Because I had my plan all figured out.    Oh how true that was when it came to every one of our adoptions.   Not one turned out like I hoped, expected, and often times desired.   I slowly began to see it was not a good idea to resist the plans God had for me.    Notice I said slowly.   I still am one of His dumbest sheep.    I often feel like I should cry out, “baaaaa!”  Instead of a word.   It’s true.

This weekend I shared a bit of my journey over here.   You will understand another level of my desire to walk His path, His way, all for His glory or not at all, after reading how God used my love for photography to show me my sins.

You begin to find out what you are truly made of when you begin a new business in a new area, where you don’t know anyone.    You begin to realize what is most important to you, and how every choice is going to determine the reaping of the fields in which you are sowing.    

I put my sights on the fields of others.   I allowed the whispers from their winds to direct my sails.   I began to long for things in which I did not truly desire before.   I felt the sting of temptation, and how quickly it betrays you.   I struggled to remember the meaning of my own dreams.   Because the dreams of others felt like weights over my eyes, mind, heart, and soul.   

I became confused and my confidence was shaken.   Because I was no longer listening to whispers of my heart; to live out my dreams, solely directed by the very One who had given them all to me from the start.  

But God.

His immense love for me never ceases to amaze and overwhelm me.   He lifted me out of the miry mess I found myself in and dusted me off so I could clearly see what I was looking for all along.  

God, You always ♥ me through it!

That is exactly what God continues to do every day of my life.   He never lets me go.  Ever!  

I am constantly reminded in this walk of faith – that God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.  Humility is one of the greatest keys to success in this life.   It takes a humble heart to truly forgive and to seek forgiveness.   It takes a humble heart to sacrifice self for the good will of others.  

Despite how the world is determined to define success for each of us.  I am holding onto my beliefs of what it truly means to be successful in this life, each story is being written through our words, deeds, and willingness to love.  Success is found in humility displayed.   It is found in the way I choose to sacrifice my will for those I love, and how deeply my love touches them.   It is found in the way I touch the lives of others so that they too will desire to be set free from the chains that bind them to this world and its definition of success.

What a life story that will be…to pass on the gifts and blessings He so graciously bestows upon us.

My life verse is used over and over by God to remind me to never stray too far from Him…

listen...

Amen and AMEN!   Thank You Lord, for always keeping me on the right path!  Thank You for keeping me close to You, where my eyes can see and my ears can hear.   Help me to never lose sight of what is most important in this life, and to never silence Your truth.   Help me to chase my dreams with reckless abandon, knowing You are leading the way and will light my path, one step at a time.   Help me to allow You to continue writing the story of my life, because Your ways are best for me.   Help me to let go of what I thought I wanted for what I know You want for me – Your best!   Help me to believe in that from the bottom of my heart to the tip of my head!   Thank You Father, for all the ways You love me…and never let me go.

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